Lesson: Seven
Learning Outcome
By the end of this session, the student will be able to:
1. demonstrate an understanding of the developmental stages of children,
2. identify the characteristics of children at each stage of their development,
3. integrate the Islamic perspective in children's development particularly the moral and spiritual aspects, and
4. apply various methods of responding to children's needs and demands.
Main Topics/Issues/ Points
1. Importance of Understanding Child Development
2. Stages in Child Development:
· Infancy
· Toddler
· Early and Middle Childhood.
· Adolescent
3. Aspect of Child Development
· Neurological and Sensory Development
· Physical growth and motor (quwwah muharrikah) development
· Emotional and social development
· Intellectual development
· Moral, character (akhlaq) and spiritual development
4. Responding to children’s needs & demands
Discussions: Main Idea
Children in Islam
Islam views children with hope and aspiration, seeing them as something to look forward to, seek and long for. As such, Islam affirms:
· A child’s right to health and life.
· A child’s right to a family, kindred, name, property and inheritance.
· A child’s right to healthcare and proper nutrition.
· A child’s right to education and the acquisition of talents.
· A child’s right to live in security and peace, and enjoy human dignity and protection under the responsibility of the parents.
Growth vs Development
Growth: quantitative changes (height, weight, and size of the physique)
Development: qualitative changes (sequential, rate, and form)
Growth and development proceeds in two directions:
· Cephalocaudal, the head muscles become strong, then the body, then the legs, then the feet (from the top to the bottom)
· proximodistal, first, the trunk of the body becomes strong, then the arms and legs, and then the hands and feet (from the inside to the outside)
Gross motor activities are related to locomotion involving the large muscles of the body ( crawling, walking, hopping, throwing, catching, and balancing)
Fine motor activities are related to manipulation and eye-hand coordination involving the small muscles of the body. following a slowly moving object, grasping, reaching a dangling object, drawing, cutting, stringing beads, and building block towers.
Stages of Child Development
A. The pre-natal stage can be divided into three phases:
· Pre-embryonic
- the zygote grows by division, and buries itself in the wall of the uterus.
- the cells organise themselves in three layers while continuing growing.
· Embryonic
- The basic organs and systems of the body start to appear from the cell layers.
· Fetal
- The fetus looks just like a human being, with its face, hands and feet. A
- All of its organs have become apparent
- Development continues until the week of delivery.
B. There are no universal definitions of the stages of child development. General definitions for the ages and stages of a child include:
- Newborn or Neonate - birth to 28 days
- Infant - 1 to 12 months
- Toddler - 1 to 3 years
- Preschooler or Early Childhood- 3 to 5 years
- School Age or Middle Childhood - 5 to 11 years
- Preadolescent or Late Childhood- 11 to 12 years
- Adolescent - 13 until 21 years
Aspects of Child Development
A. Neurological and Sensory Development
· From infancy through adolescence, children's brains which control their nervous system and senses go through tremendous change, both physically and cognitively.
· There is a four-year period of "potential" growth, which is the most critical period of human development. This time is from conception until about the third birthday. During this time, all things are possible - learning to walk, learning to talk, learning how to "fit in" to society.
· It is from early infancy to early childhood that these vital connections are made permanent.
· Touching, talking, and things an infant sees and smells all build connections if done with continuity in a loving, consistent, and predictable manner. These connections die if not maintained.
· Children raised in environmentally deprived facilities experience fewer sounds, colors, pictures, interactions and sights have smaller brains than those of children who grow up in sensually rich environments within meaningful relationships.
B. Physical and Motor Development
· Physical development in young children means two things:
o the process by which boys and girls grow larger physically, and
o their increasing skills at performing a range of various motor tasks, from riding a tricycle to stringing beads.
· Infants’ complex physical skills—sitting, standing, walking—develop in a predictable sequence whose actual timing is a function of individual maturation rate and culture.
· The other milestones that rapidly follow are:
· Three Months: A baby can reach for small, nearby objects.
· Six Months: She can sit in a high chair and grasp an object dangling before her.
· Seven Months: She can transfer objects from one hand to the other.
· Nine Months: She can use her fingers to grasp blocks.
· 12 Months: She can pick up small objects, such as a raisin.
At the same time, a child's fine motor abilities develop further.
· He becomes able to use his fingers with increasing dexterity and to perform a wide variety of tasks that require precision.
· By his second birthday, he can hold and manipulate an item such as a pencil or a feeding spoon with relative ease.
· 
He is also sufficiently coordinated to perform activities that involve a fairly complex series of steps: place objects through the appropriate openings of a "shape box," hold a crayon or marker firmly and "draw," manipulate pieces of a puzzle, and so forth.
C. Cognitive Development
· A child’s mind develops by forming schemas that help him/her assimilate experiences and that must occasionally be altered to accommodate new information.
· Children progress from the simplicity of the sensorimotor stage in the first two years to more complex stages of thinking.
· Preschool children in the preoperational stage are egocentric and unable to perform simple logical operations.
· At about age 6 or 7 they enter the concrete operational stage and can perform concrete operations, such as those required to comprehend the principle of conservation.
· Finally, at about age 12, children enter the formal operational stage, in which abstract reasoning is within their grasp.
D. Socio-emotional Development
· The development of the nature of interaction or relationship with others, and the related emotions/feelings that go along with it
· Attachment style in infancy predicts later social development.
· Children who have been deprived of maternal attention show defects in socio-emotional development
· A child’s self-concept develops gradually; by 18 months, infants recognize themselves in a mirror.
· By age 8 or 10, children’s self-images are quite stable and are linked with their independence, optimism, and sociability. \
· Children who develop a positive self-image and a happy, self-reliant manner tend to have been reared by parents who are neither permissive nor authoritarian, but authoritative while allowing their children a sense of control.
- Moral and Spiritual Development
· Moral: Concerns rules and conventions about what people do in their interactions with other people
· Development: Learning right from wrong within three domains- reason (thinking), behaviour, and feelings
· Begins to learn about right and wrong from as early as 1 ½ to 3 years
· Basic processes responsible for children’s moral behaviour: reinforcement, punishment, imitation, self-control.
· Spiritual development: The best gift of a parent to their children
Responding to children’s needs & demands
· Avoid comparing a child's development with that of other kids. Every child develops at her own pace.
· When a child is struggling with a developmental task, don't give her more help than she requires; she will get an important sense of achievement from doing it herself.
• To develop positive physical development, breastfed your child for at least the first two years.
• Encourage the child to experiment with the novel and unusual. Listen to the child's questions and comments about his or her observations. Clarify what the child has observed by repeating what you have heard and ask further questions about the experience. New questions and observations may emerge from this process of exploration together.
• Relax and enjoy the creative process with your child. Children who are constantly directed to conform to expected outcomes lose the confidence and spontaneity essential for the development of creative thinking.
• Respect the child's efforts and let them know that you have confidence in their ability to do well. Let the child have both freedom and responsibility to deal with the consequences of their thinking.
• Do not unwittingly develop mistrust when taking care of babies
• Need to provide activities and opportunities for the children to be autonomous, and not discourage them or make them feel guilty
• Provide opportunities for them to acquire skills, but not embarrass them if they are slow or make mistakes when learning these skills
• Expose children to the basic Islamic knowledge and ways of life
• Expose them to the basic learning of al-Quran
• Tell them the rewards they will get for good deeds
• Begin teaching with kalimah tayyibbah; i.e La ilaha illa Allah, Muhammad al- rasul Allah as early as possible
• Introduce them to what is permissible (halal) and forbidden (haram) as early as when the child is able to discern between the two
• Take them to mature gatherings and let them sit with grown-ups. This will increase their understanding and wisdom.
• Teach them good manners from early childhood as mentioned in the Qur'aan and the Ahaadeeth of Allah's Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam). For example, the manners of conduct in public, speaking in public, walking on the road, greeting etc.
• Avoid humiliating them - especially in front of others. Never belittle their ideas, and encourage them to take part in Islamic activities.
• Consult them and ask for their opinions
• Clothe them in a modest way and protect them from inappropriate clothing (like silk clothes for boys and preserve the Islamic dress code for girls), hairstyles and movements.
• Avoid extravagance, luxury, laziness and idleness.
• 
Give them responsibilities in accordance with their age and abilities
• Avoid entertainment and pastime gatherings, singing, music and other such activities that result in wastage of time and efforts
The importance of play in children's development
· Babies and young children play by imitating sound and actions of people (and animals) in his/her environment
· These imitations later evolve into 3 forms: Practice/Mastery Play; Symbolic Play; Games with Rules
· Play allows children to make important connections about what they know.
· Promoting children's learning and development through the provision of child-chosen activities is a further way of recognising the link between decision making and children's development of self-esteem.
Suggested activities for various age-range of children
· Babies need more than one object for them to stretch out and grasp, for example a rattle and a small soft toy.
· Providing treasure baskets for babies who are able to pick up gives them opportunities to make choices about which objects to explore and how to explore them.
· For toddlers and older pre-school children, make sure that the range of activities from which the children can choose is interesting and inviting. This will make decision making a stimulating experience for the children and, consequently, one in which they will want to engage.
Alternatives for hitting children:
· Try to show your emotions and try to avoid cursing.
· Avoid/try getting away from the situation that may lead to anger.
· Try to build again with love and affection after you feel calm.
· Try to explain that we love them and our anger is only temporary in nature.
Tips on Disciplining Children
• Light slaps on the hand when the child is using his hands to do something wrong
• Spanking the child on his buttocks in a way that is not permanently harmful but that only causes some stinging.
• Have emotions under control - don't discipline your child because you are angry with him, but rather because you want to teach him
• Present a United Front - discuss their strategy for training and disciplining their children and agree to work together as a team
• Be consistent - constantly changing the rules and expectations will only confuse your child.
• Don't reward crying - You can either listen to crying for a few days or for the rest of your life. It's your choice!
• Teach your child to apologize; Accept your child's apology and apologize for Your mistake
Selected Quotations
" We are driving our children too hard and thereby depriving them from their most precious commodity – their childhood"
Zigler, E. (1987), Psychologist at Yale University
Evidences from Qur’an
Progeny is a gift from the Almighty Allah
“Unto Allah belongs the sovereignty of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows female (offspring) upon whom He wills, and bestows male (offspring) upon whom He wills; or He mingles them, males and females, and He makes barren whom He wills. Lo! He is the Knower, Powerful.” [Al-Shura (Council): Verses 49-50]
Creation of man
:"It is We Who have created you. Why, then, do you not accept the truth? Have you ever considered that (seed) which you emit? Is it you who create it? Or are We the Creator?" (56:57-59)
"Does man reckon he will be left uncontrolled (without purpose)? Was he not once a drop of ejected semen?"( 75:36-37)
"He who has created all things in the best possible way. He commenced the creation of man from clay; then He made his progeny from an extract of discarded fluid."(32:7-8)
"We created man from a mingled drop to test him, and We made him hearing and seeing."
(The Qur'an, 76:2)
The Sex of the Baby
"He has created both sexes, male and female from a drop of semen which has been ejected." (53:45-46)
Pre-natal developmental stages of a child in the mother's womb
"Recite: In the name of your Lord Who created man from alaq. Recite: And your Lord is the Most Generous." ( 96:1-3)
"(We) then formed the drop into a clot and formed the clot into a lump and formed the lump into bones and clothed the bones in flesh; and then brought him into being as another creature. Blessed be God, the Best of Creators!"
(The Qur'an, 23:14)
Three Stages of the Baby in the Womb
"... He creates you stage by stage in your mothers' wombs in a three-fold darkness. That is God, your Lord. Sovereignty is His. There is no god but Him. So what has made you deviate?"
(The Qur'an, 39:6)
Breastfeeding
Mothers shall suckle their children for 2 whole years; (that is) for those who wish to complete the suckling. …” (2:233)
Akhlaq of the prophet
I am sent to perfect the Akhlaq of Man
The Best Gift
Surah Ibrahim 14: 24-26)
Evidences from Sunnah of The Prophet (r)
• Every newborn child is born in a state of fitrah. Then his parents make him a Jew, a Christian or a Magian.”
• The child may play for seven years and has to learn the Holy Qur’an for the next seven years……”
• Once the prophet saw kissed Hasan bin Alii r.a., someone who saw him said, I have ten children and I have never shown love to anyone of them". The prophet saw looked at the speaker with astonishment and said, "He who is not merciful will not be shown any mercy"
• The prophet saw asked a man whom he saw was embracing a child. "Do you have compassion for this child?" He answered, "Yes, I do". "Allah is merciful to you more than you are to this child, He is the most merciful (of those who show mercy)"
• T]he Prophet urged parents to demand that their children begin practicing the regular daily prayers by the age of seven. If the children do not start the practice by the age of ten, they should be disciplined by physical means --- without causing them harm or injury, of course --- only to show disapproval of their behavior
• The Prophet of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: “The example of a good companion in comparison with a bad one, is like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith's bellow; from the first you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell, while the bellows would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell from it.”
Translation of Selected Arabic Terms
Alaq – Congealed Blood
Akhlaq - Character
Questions for Discussion
1. What are the possible hazards to unborn babies?
2. What are the roles of a father-to-be to the expecting mother?
3. What are the basic rights of a child on their parents?
4. What should be the practice of a family unit in order to ensure that the child will be a physically, cognitively, emotionally, morally, and spiritually upright person?
5. What kinds of knowledge should be provided to a child who is approaching puberty
6. In today’s race for academic excellence, do you agree that a child should play less but study more or harder?
Selected Readings
Abdullah Nasih Ulwan, (2004), Pendidikan Anak-anak dalam Islam, Jilid 1, 13th Ed. Singapore: Pustaka Nasional
Santrock, John. W. 1998. Child development. (8th ed) University of Texas: Brown & Bechmark.
Tarazi. Norma, (2001). The Child in Islam. The United States of America: American Trust Publications.
Zaleha Izhab (2001). Understanding Children's Cognitive development. Paper presented at Certificate in Islamic Parenting Course. Organized by INSTED,October
